Malignant Mentors: Noel the Controller

Mentorship is supposed to be about guidance, support, and growth. But what happens when the elements are already in place for a toxic relationship? Noel the Controller is the embodiment of a mentor who abuses their power, turning what should be a nurturing environment into a controlling, manipulative one.

I’ve seen Noel in action—once, in the form of a professor who forced their way onto Ph.D. student dissertation committees, using intimidation and threats to maintain control over every aspect of a student’s development. This wasn’t mentorship—it was ego-fueled domination. Noel thrived on the power imbalance, creating an atmosphere where students feared any attempt to break free.

And this behavior isn’t limited to academia. I encountered a different version of Noel—a C-suite executive who later became CEO. During a meeting, Noel made a misogynistic comment about a secretary as soon as she was barely out of earshot (maybe), reinforcing dominance by belittling others. Later in the same meeting, Noel sought my input on firing a supervisor, not for professional reasons but because Noel didn’t didn’t like the way the person “smelled.” I had only been with the company for three months, and here I was, being pulled into this personal vendetta.

Mentors like Noel the Controller aren’t just problematic—they’re dangerous. They stifle growth, instill fear, and manipulate situations to their own advantage. When you encounter a mentor who thrives on control and intimidation, it’s time to reevaluate the relationship and protect your own development. Is he just a part of the culture around you? Noel the Controller is a cautionary tale of what happens when mentorship goes terribly wrong.

Come back tomorrow and I’ll share some ideas about how to deal with these malignant mentors.

What do you think?

See you tomorrow!

#Mentoring #WorkplaceDynamics #CareerAdvice #Leadership #Badmentor